Crispy
Disgusting Thing
- Joined
- February 18, 2010
- Messages
- 323
Just so you guys know exactly what it is you're dealing with, I've decided to share some of the juicier bits of a thread at Codex started by bryce back in 2007 when he was still a regular poster there (i.e. not banned yet). Its title was "A funny PM I got from roqua" and it's considered a true Codex Classic™, having been preserved for all eternity in our own little museum of derp, lovingly named Retardo Land. In the thread, bryce is "Jim Kata" (one of his original accounts there) and his… adversary is a poster named, of course, "roqua".
Here's the preamble (some of this is rather crude — my advanced apologies). The first paragraph is roqua's (who really is crazy also but hasn't been to Codex in years) likely alcohol-fueled PM to bryce:
And bryce's first response to him:
There is some back-and-forth that follows, the usual internet tough guy routine. They started dancing around meeting in NYC at one point, but things remained relatively tame.
But then roqua steps it up a notch:
Again, we all know roqua was nuts, but there apparently was a legitimate reason for all his rage. This is roqua quoting a PM he got from bryce:
Real? Not real? Hmm. bryce's reply to that:
So he admits he said those things to roqua, actually threatening to rape his wife.
But wait, there's more! After some additional posturing, e-dick waving, roqua gave him his address, actually posted a picture of himself, etc., eventually roqua states:
To which our friend bryce replies:
And this all within just the first 5 pages! The thread itself is 17 pages long! Imagine that. 17 pages of two grown men threatening to rape each other, to rape each other's children, to beat each other senseless, and to do many other unspeakable things to one another. That's the wonder of Codex Retardo Land. All your dreams can come true there, and confirmation that this thread actually exists can be yours by becoming a loyal paid member¹ of RPG Codex today!
¹ Actual payment for membership not required but minimum one-year free membership is required in lieu of monetary donation.
Here's the preamble (some of this is rather crude — my advanced apologies). The first paragraph is roqua's (who really is crazy also but hasn't been to Codex in years) likely alcohol-fueled PM to bryce:
"Listen, I know its hard for an invalid, who has been protected by the system and sheltered inside his whole life due to being useless and unemployed, to understand why people just don’t cross certain lines, but I need you to understand something. I’m going to hurt you bad. Old, retarded, invalid, it doesn’t matter now. When I see you, no matter how pathetic you look, I’m going to fucking rape every orifice of your body and then pee in them all. I know you feel safe, locked in your filthy, section-8 apartment, posting on the internet where no one can physically get to you. And you’ll probably feel that way until I kick in your door, kick in your teeth, and stick my cock in your ass. And I know how pathetic you are, that’s why your comment really didn’t get me mad. You are lacking the mental capacity to understand you don’t talk about other people’s kids, and especially don’t wish them death. You just can’t understand that or anything beyond lying on the internet all day. And keep in mind that while I’m washing the jism I shot in your eyes out with my urine stream, that I’m not doing it out of hate, since I can’t hate the truly pathetic. I’ll actually be doing it because your parents didn’t know how to raise someone right and ended up producing you. Think of it as tough-love. I’m also going to break all your fingers so you can’t do the one thing you can do and look forward to: type on the internet to much.
And bryce's first response to him:
All I can say is PLANE TICKETS, BITCH!
And I am dead serious. Old as I am, I has a strong suspicion I could kick your ass. In fact, my bet is when you see my well over six foor frame and my gnarled old man hand that have the strength no younger generation can match, you will act REAL nice.
My name is Bryce ######. As long as you book the flight leaving from LAX on a friday morning and returning on a sunday night (and give me a month notice), I will gladly accept your challenge and proceed to give you the most serious humiliation of your life. I'll even post pictures of you cowering from me.
There is some back-and-forth that follows, the usual internet tough guy routine. They started dancing around meeting in NYC at one point, but things remained relatively tame.
But then roqua steps it up a notch:
I'm 5 ft 9 inches, about 175-180 lbs depedning on if I have to shit or not. Lets say you are a herculian giant, this is how it will go: I'll work you over while you swing like a big retard. Then you'll get mad and try and grab me or wrestle with me, at which time I'll bite a big chunk out of you. Thats guarding pain, you'll have no choice but to let go and look at it and cover it with your hands. At which point you'll get scared, and know I don't give a fuck, and no one wants to fight someone who is willing to bite chunks out of them, or get chunks biten out of them. Thats when I'll start enjoying it, fealing your fear and seeing it in your face and eyes. Then I'll tell you what I'm going to do before I do it, and I'll do it slow because it will take time to get it right. There is a lot of holes needing raping, and my body needs to generate a lot of jism and urine. I'm not a jism and urine producing machine, so it won't be quick. But I promise, I be laughing a lot, and there'll be a smile on my face the whole time. If you relax it will go easier, but I won't enjoy it as much.
But again, you are the biggest liar on the internet. So I have a feeling I'll show up and you'll think the jokes on me as you post more lies on the interent and live out the rest of your sad, shallow, and meaningless days thinking you are safe. Some one here is internet savvy enough to find your address though, and I'll pay good money for it. Or you could be a man and actually show up and just get this over with.
Again, we all know roqua was nuts, but there apparently was a legitimate reason for all his rage. This is roqua quoting a PM he got from bryce:
Better yet, let's get rid of some real lower life forms and feed your daughter to a tiger.
I'd pay twenty, maybe thirty dollars, for that.
I'd pay an extra five dollars to push her myself.
Maybe even fitty dollars to tear your wife's vagina out with a meathook and feed it to a crocodile.
As for me, I have done more work and made more money than you ever will. I helped design many of the weapons that kept this country from being another cmmie shithole.
Real? Not real? Hmm. bryce's reply to that:
Oh please. You have said worse to me a hundred times, and even made death threats against me.
You could go to jail for what you siad.
Would I enjoy killing your retard wife and daughter? Sure? Would I do it or even threaten to? Of course not.
You are a sick dog, and maybe it's time you're put down.
So he admits he said those things to roqua, actually threatening to rape his wife.
But wait, there's more! After some additional posturing, e-dick waving, roqua gave him his address, actually posted a picture of himself, etc., eventually roqua states:
I'll drive to NY and fight anyone who shows. Why post when we can break the trend of pansie ass fucks not backing up their words with actions. Posting a picture to somehow show I'm tough and willing is gay, punching people isn't. I don't want to be gay, but I'd really like to punch some of you nancies.
To which our friend bryce replies:
1. Plane tickets. Look, it's pretty fucking simple. Roqua sends me a death threat, a challenge if you will. I give him terms. If he is too much of a pussy or too POOR to afford a 200 dollar fucking plane ticket!!!! Give me a mother fucking break. Instead he (literally) offers to have gay sex with me one on one in a hotel room. I gave him the chance to settle it like a gentleman, or as much like one as he is capable of, and that's how he responds. So be it. He is the one who wanted a piece of me not the other way around.
Just by coincidence, btw, I spend over 200 dollars on entertainment tonight since last time I posted.
2. DorkOvenLoad - Hey, dumbfuck! Don't post people's IPs or locations. Are you a fucking retard? AS I EXPLAINED BEFORE, NO I DO NOT LIVE IN LOS ANGELES. However, I can and do travel extensively to California and fly in and out of LAX fairly regularly.
3. Fights not going to real life. You are right. You know why? Because I know short men disease people like this dumbfuck to a T. I am not sure if I have posted it on here or not, but probably have, but I have been in this EXACT situation before. I had a moron posting death threats to me on a rgular basis for about a year, saying he would do this and that blah blah blah. He was from NYC. Well, I still go back to visit on occasion (and dumbfucks like this guy and Roqua are the main reason I left the east coast in the first place), so I offered to meet him. He was going to kill me and humiliate me etc., as well. To which I just laugh. Then I meet the little fucker. He, too, is 5'9 and 180 pounds. Exactly. Thinks he's muscular, but really is a fucking cremepuff. Just like Roqua (whose picture I recall). Well, I am old enough that I am unsure of my height (I have actually shrunk) but I am about 190 lbs and at last check about 4.5% fat. Not enough fat because I can't keep down any fucking food. BUT EVEN IN THIS WEAKENED CONDITION, faced with someone like me Roqua would no doubt shit his fucking pants. The guy who I met this way was REALLY nice to me in person, and from then on online. This was some retard from the fuckedcompany.com message boards. He begged me not to tell anyone about it so he wouldn't look (even more) retarded, but many of the people there knew all about it.
So yes, there is ZERO chance of a fight. As for me going, why yes I'll take free tickets to NYC from anyone, any time. But I have no desire to fight Roqua.
But, as I said, if he did attack me when we met I would choke the fucking life out of him, right on the spot, mercilessly, and I WOULD kill him. Of this I have zero doubt. ZERO. If he were int he same room with me he would have zero doubt as well. No one fucks with me, and I mea NO ONE, even at my advanced age.
4. My name. I can board the plane as Bryce ###### (and always do), and that is all that matters. I won't say what I have changed to keep myself from being stalked, but most of my legal effects use adifferent spelling, and for immigration it was a completely different name entirely. Sorry, but I am not stupid enough to post the way to my house so a dumbfuck like Roqua can break in and attack me while I'm asleep (which is the only way he would ever have the courage).
And this all within just the first 5 pages! The thread itself is 17 pages long! Imagine that. 17 pages of two grown men threatening to rape each other, to rape each other's children, to beat each other senseless, and to do many other unspeakable things to one another. That's the wonder of Codex Retardo Land. All your dreams can come true there, and confirmation that this thread actually exists can be yours by becoming a loyal paid member¹ of RPG Codex today!
¹ Actual payment for membership not required but minimum one-year free membership is required in lieu of monetary donation.
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2010
- Messages
- 323